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The Power of a Question
One of our greatest philosophers said, "The unexamined life
is not worth living." The impact from the teachings of Socrates
continues to be felt today as discussion groups gather to interact
through the exploration of a thought-provoking question. The
Socrates Café, as it is known, founded by Christopher
Phillips in 1996, meets monthly throughout the nation as well as
other countries. It is comprised of small groups that have a quest
for looking deeper into the meaning of life. Ideas are explored
and developed through a question voted on by the group. There is
no consensus required, nor judgment of thought. It is merely an
opportunity to gather and exchange ideas.
Why has this 5th century thinker been such a strong force today
in our lives? People have a yearning to know the truth about their
existence. Our questions range from, "Where did I come from?"
"What am I doing here?" "Why do we die?"
and "Where am I going?" Some people are acutely conscious
of the search and pursue it with passion; others seek it passively,
and still others are oblivious or disinterested. They have not yet
awakened to the quest. One thing we do know is that their time will
come. It’s not a matter of if, but when. It is the nature
of the soul, our essence, the being, to know itself.
Posing a question to ourselves allows us to introspect, discover,
evaluate and ponder. In other words, it’s an opportunity to
get to know yourself by examining everything under the sun and beyond.
It is most important to answer the questions we’ve been living
with before we get to the universal questions of life, death and
the other great "whys" we eventually ask. Questions
like, "why do I feel so incomplete being alone? Something
like an unfinished symphony. I actually need to be in relationship,
but why?" Allow yourself to open the Pandora’s box of
your mind and use the pick ax of your intention to chip away to
the answers. Being aware that you may have a lack of self-love and
self-worth closes the chasm of confusion and self-pity. Never wanting
to admit that you’re yearning for another to fulfill your
emptiness is big. These are the challenging questions that will
ultimately bring you to a place of contentment and bliss. Questions
are revealing and that’s the whole idea.
We can benefit tremendously when we recognize we are either being
frightened to explore another point of view while exploring the
question. We become rigid and unwilling to entertain another perspective.
Especially when we have an investment at stake. We’ll do anything
to maintain our righteous position. The deeper the fear the deeper
in strength in grows. "I’m right, which means you must
be wrong." There’s nothing to discuss, let alone explore.
Know anybody with these qualities?
Being contemplative about a question allows us to stop our incessant
"doingness" and be still long enough to reflect—a
worthwhile departure from our active lives. When we look more intently
into questions like the following, we exercise and stimulate our
brains, as well as discover how our thinking actually works. Often
we discover the questions can’t be answered without inserting
our own beliefs into the mix.
"What is evil?"
"When, if ever, is war justified?"
"What is normal?"
Unearthing and exposing our thoughts can be perceived as favorable,
threatening or even a confusing experience. We may feel a sense
of intimidation as we examine our thoughts. However, the bottom
line is, we are better off to have challenged ourselves than to
believe our thinking is always right. Did you know that what you
think defines your beliefs and those beliefs can create happiness
or misery, success or failure, confidence or low self-esteem? It’s
true. Even more difficult to accept is that our thoughts have an
impact on the world around us, but they do.
Self-examination is crucial to personal growth. Once you begin
the process, you will never stop, as one change in thinking triggers
another. Here are five steps to start the process of thought expansion
in your life. Practice with it and discover that you can fall back
on this method each time you come up against a challenging situation
that you would rather change than live with.
- Your best thinking occurs
where you can find a sense of peace, and that spot is different
for everyone. Find a location, inside or out, that gives you the
freedom to think. While we nearly always think random and scattered
thoughts, regardless of where we are, we can do our best introspecting
in a space that brings a sense of calm. So, find your spot.
- Do you have something aggravating you? How about
a worry or fear? Choose that as your first thought to examine.
Get rid of the most prominent and aggravating thoughts first to
clear the slate for bigger issues.
- Let that thought bob right to the top of your
thinking. Take that thought and run with it. It will most likely
bounce from one aspect of the problem to the next attempting to
escape your focus, but that’s okay. It’s a little
like trying to find the starting point on a gnarly old ball of
yarn. Let it run wild until you begin to see a theme.
- Once you see that the thought tends to take
you down a particular road, whether it is about how right you
are, anger or fear, justification or you name it, ask yourself
if that thought is serving you in any way. This sounds difficult,
but the fact is, unless your thoughts support you and those around
you, they are useless and will hold you back on your path to self-awareness.
So, look at the thought and the feelings it arouses, and really
ask yourself, "Do I want this thought? In what way does
it serve me? Why am I hanging onto it?" You may discover
you’ve held that thought because it might mean admitting
to a mistake, saying you are sorry, or standing up for yourself
is too great of a challenge. Whatever it is, once you discover
it, you can change it.
- You are a self-correcting organism. No one can
make change for you but you. You can read a million books, travel
to dozens of therapists, but it will always come back to you.
Now that you’ve figured out what thoughts are holding you
back, pick a new one. Yes, it’s as simple as that; pick
a new thought. This time, choose a thought that supports you and
your best friend, you and your spouse, even you and the banker whose
bad hair day has left you anxious.
We can educate ourselves about ourself simply by asking a question.
When we become aware of ourselves, we trigger our deepest potential
for happiness, abundance and health.
Use the magic of the question to know your partner more intimately,
to understand your child, or your neighbor, but mostly use it to
"know thyself," words from yet another famous Greek
philosopher. When you know yourself, you will begin to know your
world in a uniquely empowered way. |
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